i’m sorry for not writing you lately, but who the fuck knew retail was SUCH a time consumer? i just hope you appreciate how hard your people work for you, marc. here are some things i’m getting tired of saying every day at reiss:
oh, that’s such a good color on you.
sure, wear it however you like.
can i put these in a fitting room for you?
sir, could you please pull your pants up, i’m getting uncomfortable.
sorry henry, i’m just really hung over. i swear i’ll be better tomorrow.
speaking of hung over, i often stumble into reiss with my hair a mess and tranny lipstick on my cheek, which usually means they throw me in the basement to fold shirts until i’m sober enough to deal with customers. i’d say i’m downstairs folding and organizing about 1/2 of the day, which is fine. it really gives me the chance to work with the garments and makes me appreciate their fine, chinese stitching. when a little asian girl is being raped on a conveyor belt by her supervisor and thinking, ‘god i just want to get back to sewing, i hope people appreciate my work,’ i can finally say back, ‘i do, honey. stay strong and keep that cross-stiching FIERCE.’
all the running up and down stairs i do every day is really helping with my modeling, marc. it’s toning my ass up nicely and really helping with my action poses. take a gander at this tasty lick:
the recipe for this photo is as follows:
2 parts cigarette ad
1 part marc jacobs ad
2 tsps of vintage 90210
1 tbsp homeless outreach flyer
and a dash of pro-choice pamphlet
okay marc, hopefully i’ll be able to write you soon. until then, stay thin and get legal to write me up a contract for your spring/summer ’09 campaign. hell, i’ll even model for your fragrance line.
oh, PS, the bangle and bag in that photo were donations from the marble arch foundation for fierce skanks. thanks bitch.